Who Can It Be Now?
by jenajasper
Summary: Dean knew how to push Sam's buttons. Today, Sam decided to push back. And that always worked out well, didn't it?
1. Chapter 1

Sam felt time stop. He stared slack-jawed and eyes dulled into his brother's face. He just couldn't believe some of the things that came out of that guy's mouth.

The insults were bad enough but, expected. They were brothers, after all. This type of teasing was normal, maybe even genetic. The movie references were usually accurate. Even if, they were sometimes, most times, inappropriate.

But his historical quotations, what he didn't take credit for, he misquoted.

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Dean loved to mangle quotations. He knew Sam would recognize them and it was a twisted little thrill he got in knowing that he was messing with that genius brain.

It was usually acknowledged with a furrowed brow and a far away look indicating that Sam wasn't quite sure of what he heard. Other times, it was the straight-up bitch-face. At those times, Sam knew he had just stepped into 'Dean's world of made up shit, aisle one: just screwing with you'. Like now.

"Dean, Shakespeare never said that!"

"Sure he did. You must not have been paying attention that day." He answered, with a smile.

Sam knew his brother did these things just to get a rise out of him and it always worked. He really shouldn't have been surprised that Dean would quote Shakespeare; he was more well read than he admitted. However, why did he need to misquote? And so badly.

"It's two words, Dean. And it's pronounced, yes sire, not yesiree."

Dean let out a small laugh and wore an expression that almost made Sam think twice. Then he remembered another insult.

"Just like what you told me the other day about Ben Franklin."

Dean looked sincerely puzzled. Sam knew he was being played and pressed his lips together tightly but he just couldn't help himself. He couldn't let Dean get away with it.

Sam snapped. "He wouldn't even know the word, cheerleader!"


	2. Chapter 2

Sam knew his brother was a smart guy. He wasn't an avid reader, at least not like Sam. But, if something was of interest to Dean, he could pore over the books with the best of them. And he never forgot.

Dean could have the most obscure bit of information in his memory and if the occasion presented itself, he could pull that fact out like a magician with a rabbit.

All of this only intensified Sam's feeling of how Dean was messing with him. Well, maybe two could play this game. He remembered something he read some time ago.

He found it in one of Bobby's older books which was buried under previously undisturbed stacks. It was a scrap of paper written many years earlier in an unknown hand. A short list of relatively common ingredients, in combination, to be poured in alcohol. The directions were just so simple as to appear unbelievable. All it took was a few lines recited over the mixing and a phrase to encourage the resulting behavior.

It was an uncomplicated little potion. It was temporary; it was harmless with no after effects. It would serve his purposes. Sam felt it was perfect.

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Sam volunteered to make the beer run, He had a few other things to pick up. He felt the time was right to put his plan in motion. All he had read assured him that it would work. He also spoke to a guy who had actually seen it done. It was kinda like hypnosis, he said. Dean wouldn't do anything out of character that might arouse suspicion.

In short order, Sam found all that he needed and mixed it up. It had no color, no smell, as he expected, so it should go unnoticed. He put the small bottle in his pocket, quite pleased with himself. He had only to remember to ask his brother, "What do you say to that, Dean?"


	3. Chapter 3

When Sam returned, he took two beers and uncapped them. He poured the potion in one and went to find his brother.

Sam handed Dean a beer and watched as he drank it down quickly, in three pulls. He smiled, as he said " You know, Dean, it's pretty quiet. I believe we may be able to take a little break. What do you say to that?"

Dean took a minute, then spoke. "You have to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer."

Sam had an uncertain look on his face as he watched his brother leave the room. He called after him. "Hey, that was a pretty good one." Sam watched his brother walk away thinking that perhaps he may have been premature.

Then, he watched Dean pause and slowly turning his head, he spoke over his shoulder. "That was W.C. Fields, by the way. I can't take credit for it" Then he turned back and continued toward the kitchen.

Sam sat back realizing that he had something to believe in too.

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Dean opened the refrigerator and leaned in. He reached to grab two bottles and had a fleeting thought. That was a pretty awesome remark, one of his favorites, to tell the truth. He wondered why he would give it away. He shrugged it off and the thought was gone.

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Later that evening, after dinner, Sam asked Dean to check a wound he had received while on their last job. It was a long cut from his left shoulder to the middle of his back. There wasn't a need for stitches for it wasn't too deep but, the location was awkward and it was irritating. Sam realized his complaining sounded very much like whining, even to himself.

In an attempt to cut off Dean's remarks, which Sam was sure would include the words 'cry', 'baby' and probably 'wuss', he took the blame for his injury and faulted himself for being careless. Unintentionally, he said. "What do you say to that?"

Dean ruffled Sam's hair as he spoke. "You know, Teddy Roosevelt said 'the only man who never makes mistakes is the man who never does anything.'"

He had to admit the sentiment was there but, Sam was a little bit disappointed with that remark.


	4. Chapter 4

Sam was up early the next morning. While he was out on his run, he did his thinking. The spell was about to expire, at least he hoped it would be soon.

This had not been as much fun as he had anticipated. His brother still said the same clever things however, not being able to twist them into being what 'Dean said' was more disappointing than Sam expected. He had memorized the spell but, had never unfolded the slip of paper. If he had, he would have discovered the reason this particular bit of magic was hidden in an old book under a stack of other older books.

That guy Sam spoke to was right. The spell worked; he had seen it. But he wasn't the one who used it.

The creator of the potion was forced to cooperate so, she added a little payback. Success was guaranteed but not satisfaction.

Thankfully, Dean seemed to be oblivious and appeared to be behaving as usual.

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Dean felt his head clear with the steam from the shower. He wasn't getting sick but he felt a little off, like his brain was working harder or like he had something on the edge of his memory that he couldn't quite reach. Whatever, it was gone now. But, it was an odd sort of feeling. A thought struck him. 'What do you say to that, Dean?'

He felt the heat rise from the soles of his feet, straight up through his core, to the top of his head. He was surprised that he needed the towel to dry off and that the water hadn't simply evaporated from his skin.

He didn't know how yet but, he did know who. His gut instinct was to scream Sam's name and kick some ass. But, he controlled himself. It was just a prank; let's teach big brother a lesson. Okay, two can do that dance.

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When Dean entered the kitchen, Sam was already seated. He wasted no time in starting the conversation.

" That guy we worked with the other day? What a douche."

Sam agreed. They were there to help and he had quickly steered the brothers in the wrong direction. Yet they had still managed to get the job done without any thanks.

"You know," Dean said, "I could carve a better man out of a banana."

"What did you say?" Sam snapped his head around to look at his brother. The expression on his face made Dean turn away. He played it off by pouring himself a cup of coffee. It would take a few seconds to wipe the huge grin off his face.

Eventually, he faced Sam and said, "That's Vonnegut but, you knew that. Right, Sammy?"

With that, Dean started breakfast.


	5. Chapter 5

Sam felt off balanced. He did remember reading that. Still, he wasn't sure who was playing now. Dean was still quoting correctly and giving credit. But, he had that look, that attitude, that Dean-ness..

As they ate, they continued to talk. They always reviewed the work; every job had the potential to teach them or remind them of something they needed to know.

This last one reminded them how not all hunters were magnanimous. Even after he misguided them with false leads, Sam still tried to convince the guy to let them stick around and help close the case. He was an old timer with his own methods and practically chased them off.

"What would you say to that, Dean?" Sam waited, unsure if the spell was still active, given his brother's earlier display.

"You know what I would have told him? Just what John Wayne said in 'Stagecoach'. 'You may need me and this Winchester, Curley'"

And yes, much to Sam's chagrin, Dean did the impersonation.

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The Winchesters pretty much took the rest of their day off as a day off. Sam read whatever struck his fancy, not very much of it having to do with work or research. Even his time on the internet was personal and pleasurable.

Dean spent most of his day with his baby and his music. He did, however, at one point, watch that John Wayne movie.

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Unable to help himself, Sam did find something interesting that could be their next job as soon as the next day. He gave Dean the details and asked, "What do you say to that?"

Dean took a minute. It appeared to Sam that he was thinking about what to say. He said, "I wish I had an answer for that. Because I'm tired of answering that question." And then he smiled.

Dean watched Sam furrow his brow and get that far away look in his eyes. He thought to himself, 'welcome to Dean's world…." After about a minute, he decided to put Sam out of his misery.

"Yogi Berra and it's legit." Then he smiled, the big one, and said, "Gotcha! You deserve that for messing with the master. Now, are you going to tell me how you did it?"

Now it was Sam's turn. He said, "You know a conjurer gets no credit when once he has explained his trick."

With half a smile and a nod, Dean responded, "Sherlock."

"I never thought I'd miss it but, I'm glad you're back to yourself."

"Wow, Sammy, I don't know what to say to that."


End file.
